Tuesday 15 October 2013

Girls getting blind drunk at parties

Ok, so Steubenville happened, and now another case has come up from Maryville where a 14 year old girl had been drinking, was raped by an older guy aged 17 (there is evidence and confessions) yet the girl and her family have been run out of town, and their old home (still owned by her mother) mysteriously burnt down. Oh, and her 13 year old friend was also raped by another boy who also filmed the other rape. However, the prosecutor said there "wasn't enough evidence" and decided to not take it to court because of...reasons. Maybe it was really because one of the accused is the grandson of a "prominent former Missouri state representative". A Republican one (we all know how much they like the ladies and their rights!).

Anyway, in these cases, you always hear a few people going "well WHY were they drinking so heavily in the first place?!" Not in a concerned way, but in a "well if they weren't drunk, they wouldn't have gotten raped" way. In a victim-blaming way.

So why do these young girls drink so much at parties, especially with older guys? Let's see:

  • They want to impress - in a lot of teenagers' minds, drinking = acting like an adult, because only adults are legally allowed to drink. 
  • They want to look cool - drinking underage = rebelling/messing about = cool. Also, most older kids are often automatically seen as cooler, so hanging out with the older kids = you become cool by association. Cool = life is easier/don't get bullied.
  • They are constantly told that drinking is the best way to have fun and parties without alcohol are laaaame - just look at films/adverts/tv. I looked into alcohol adverts as part of my degree and the majority of them equate drinking with having fun. Alcohol is highly glamorised.
  • Peer pressure - basically everyone who conforms to the above ideas forcing them on others.
And to those of you wondering why their parents "let" them drink: they didn't, they were teenagers sneaking around. Also, I can be harsh on parents sometimes, but these kids were teenagers who need a little independence and trust from parents. Also, the mum of one of the victims (in whose house the girls were originally staying), was ASLEEP. Yeah, those stupid, unconscious, lazy parents....

And to others wondering why these girls were "stupid" enough to get drunk around boys: NOT EVERY GUY IS A POTENTIAL RAPIST. I reckon most guys wouldn't encourage young girls to get blackout-drunk. I also reckon most guys would help a drunk girl get home instead of rape her & leave her to freeze on her front lawn.

I don't drink huge amounts (especially on nights out) because of these reasons:
  • I want to remember the night
  • I don't want to lose any of my stuff (keys, purse, phone, etc.)
  • I don't want some creep trying to take advantage of me
HOWEVER, if I am at a party with friends & was surrounded by people I trusted, I would assume that I could trust them enough to make sure I was ok if I ended up drinking a little too much.

I would advise fellow ladies not to get blind-drunk, but to be honest, women & girls who drink a lot and then are sexually assaulted should not be told "well you shouldn't have drunk so much"; they are not to blame for their rapes, the rapist taking advantage of them is. I also don't think kids should be drinking that amount at that age, but no one deserves to be raped because they were naive teens who made a couple of stupid mistakes.

The only thing they are guilty of is trusting someone who took advantage of that trust & turned out to be a rapist, & those guys don't tend to go around wearing "I'm a rapist" t-shirts.




Sorry for the slightly serious/sad topic. I just saw the articles & had to get this off my chest. Just to let you know, I also have a Tumblr now and I do shorter, more frequent (& usually more light-hearted) posts on there. Please do go follow me on there if you have one too!

2 comments:

  1. A lot of what you are saying about wanting to impress and being cool, and I think a lot of what went wrong with the victims in the case though it wasn't mentioned in the article, was the illegality of drinking in America.

    In the UK, it's not actually an offence for an underage person to drink. It is illegal for them to buy alcohol,for anybody else to supply them with alcohol, and some of the stuff I've heard people getting in to afterwards once they're absolutely tanked is illegal. But as far as I know, underage drinking is not in itself a crime on this side of the Atlantic.

    In America, or at least in certain states (don't know about Missouri,) underage drinking is a crime and kids can be arrested and punished for it like any other criminal. So the if the girls did commit a criminal offence of underage drinking, it a) makes it seem a lot more impressive and cool in front of their so-called 'friends,' and b) puts their prosecuting claim on very shaky ground indeed, having basically to admit to committing a crime in order to prosecute the offender for the criminal offence of rape.

    That having been said, there is no reason - NO REASON - this case should have been dropped. The guy confessed, how much evidence do they need? Yes, the victim's family didn't help by kicking up such a storm about it, and there may have been a reason that the case was dropped. But if the only explanation anyone is giving us is: "Not enough evidence," which there clearly was, that only leaves us to speculate about hand washing/backroom deals/whatever underhanded analogy you can come up with.

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  2. This is messed up. Especially when it comes to underage girls, do the adults not care enough to punish the assaulters/rapists?

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