My mum came into my room this morning to ask if I thought an e-mail she'd gotten through from 'Apple' was genuine, as it seemed a bit "weird"; she asked if I could double check it and if there was a way to send it into Apple so they know of the scam. Here it is: Subject: Your Apple ID is automatically disabled
My mum was completely right to think it was a scam. Here are some obvious reasons why:
The sender was labelled "Apple", but if you clicked on it, you saw that the actual e-mail address was "ap-confirm@dfds.com". Hmmm...
The reason for "disabling" the user's account is reaaaaally vage. I'd understand if they'd "detected" unauthorised login attempts, but "detect" is not in past-tense, so it sounds like they did it for no reason whatsoever. In fact, it is full of weird spelling and grammatical errors which make it look very unprofessional. Bit stupid...
It said my mum's Apple ID was disabled, but if that was true, then she probably couldn't have used her iPad to check her emails online... Ahem...
It was asking the receiver to click on a link and enter their login info - most companies say they will never ask for your login details in emails. Another weird thing was the wording - they "recommend" users do it to get their ID back, rather than say they need to. Riiiight...
The link leads to "http://thehaystackgroup.com.au/api", which then lengthens out into "http://apple.session.id94.cepl.com.au/IDMSWebAuth/login.html/jsessionid//index.html?login=1&appleid=loginuk", showing this page:
All the links lead to "www.google.com/"insert Apple product here". Seems legit...
The link for any comments or queries going to "Apple.com" actually sent you to a Tesco Bank Contact Page. Bit weird...
It then lists the address of "Apple Personal Finance plc." (a company which doesn't exist), which I immediately recognise as the rather large Tesco Bank offices in Edinburgh, as I've gone past it on the train more times than I can remember... Erm...
It then finishes off the smallprint with "No responsibility is accepted by Tesco Personal Finance" when talking about possible viruses. What?
My conclusion: someone used the template of a previous Tesco Bank phishing scam and has changed some of the words to "Apple".
If you know of anyone with an Apple ID, do let them know that this e-mail is doing the rounds and to be careful if it gets past the spam filter. Also, if you know anyone who isn't sure of the signs of an email scam, do show them what to look out for; don't forget to let them know that some scam/phishing emails are more professional-looking than this one... Basic scam-detecting tips:
Check the sending address. Don't trust an email from Services_Payments@Pay_PAl.Com, especially when you use paypal.co.uk and only ever get emails from an address from that site.
Don't input your login details for anything ANYWHERE other than the actual site you use them on.
Look at the spelling, grammar & punctuation - if it's odd, then it's most likely spam.
READ THE SMALL PRINT. They often re-use templates and sometimes don't change all the details properly (like in the email above).
If you click the links, check the site address for obvious differences to the ACTUAL site you use, look out for any re-routes as the page is loading, etc. If you don't want to click the links (just in case of viruses), you should be able to easily see the addresses by hovering your mouse over them.
If you do click the links and go to the site, look at any links on that page; sometimes they don't bother to link them all properly in the hope that the receiver of the email will be in too much of a rush/panic to check that they're real links (like in the email above).
Don't just trust something because it has a logo on it. Anyone can use Google Image search.
If you don't actually have an account with the company apparently sending you a letter, that's a big giveaway...
I recently came across a Young Turks video about how women also perpetuate sexism towards women by writing crappy articles about "who wore it better" and bitchy articles from Daily Mail writers. They mention Liz Jones saying how Rihanna's outfits "invite rape" and there is a massive debate in the comments section about whether women's clothes do "invite rape". If you would like to watch the video, here it is:
Ok, so the idea that 'certain provocative clothes "invite rape"' is even being debated annoys me. What the person is wearing doesn't matter, what matters is that someone decided to sexually abuse them. A lot of it is actually to do with power over another person; just look at rape in male prisons - the perpetrators are men using rape to exert power over other men (i.e. make them their 'bitch'), not gay guys who just think the victims look "hot" (in fact, LGBT people are more likely to be a victim than others). The only 'sexual' reason for rape that I can think of would probably be sexual frustration, not just that someone "looked sexy"; to clarify, by 'sexual frustration', I don't mean the normal kind, I mean they wanted to have sex and they were frustrated that the other person said no so they did it anyway... Now, some people spoke about advising women to not dress provocatively, saying it's not 'victim blaming' but just giving advice for women to be safer. Someone said that an equivalent would be if their friend got mugged in a bad part of town, say "well why did you go there? Take this other route next time" Another said that if someone gets robbed, they are advised to have better security after being robbed and if they get robbed again, it's kinda their fault for not listening. Ok, let me break things down for you to explain why your argument is crap, especially when it comes to court trials: if the mugger goes to court, the judge doesn't go easy on them and say to the victim "but what did you expect walking round there?" The criminal is seen as exactly what they are: a criminal. They are charged. Same with the burglaries - burglars don't usually get lower sentences just because the house owner left a window open with the TV in view. However, with rape cases, the victim's actions (being nice to the attacker beforehand) and clothing (what is on 'display') is often taken into account when deciding how bad the level of the crime was and what the sentence should be. Mugging is mugging. Burglary is burglary. But rape, even with glaring proof, is sometimes only 'real' rape if the girl didn't have anything on show and didn't "encourage" (i.e. be flirty or nice, because apparently that = immediate invite for sex) the guy, or if they put up a real fight and show signs of real damage. She was wearing skinny jeans? The jury reckons it must've been consensual as they're hard to take off...(because apparently rapists don't use force to remove clothing). One bizarre example was a Judge saying that "some girls enjoy being raped". WTF?! The truth of the matter is that we shouldn't have to have adverts telling us to hide our valuables when we walk along the street, or telling us to keep our windows locked and have burglar alarms installed, but we do. Robbers of all kinds are looking for an easy grab, a way to slip in and steal valuables, so we are advised to be careful and not stand out as an "easy target". It is not our fault if we are robbed, and nothing can guarantee you won't get robbed, but we are advised to take precautions. Whilst robbers are not the same as rapists (please stop equating the two, people), it is a sad fact that women do have to be careful of certain creeps wanting to sexually assault them in the street. I was taught safety tips at school by some people who came in from our local council and some members of the Metropolitan Police. Wanna know something? None of them said anything about not dressing "provocatively". Most of the safety tips we were given were also paired up with avoiding muggings, as we were just as likely to experience either one (cheerful thought...), but here are a few things I remember being warned about when it came to opportunistic rapists who attack women walking alone in the street, and some of the safety tips we were given:
They often attack women with long hair (the stereotypical haircut for women) as it is easy to grab from behind and pull them off-balance. Ponytails are especially easy to grab.
Don't wear a scarf that hangs off the back of your shoulder(s) - another easy grab-point and they could strangle you.
Walk near the curb - do not walk on the inside of the pavement, especially when there is a man walking on the same side as you and especially if there is a wall on that side, as they can walk along the outside of the pavement and pin you against it.
If you are worried you're being followed by someone behind you, cross the road - if possible, walk into a nearby shop and tell the people behind the counter. Stay where there are other people.
Try to avoid secluded areas, stick to the main roads where there are more people and better street lighting.
Try to stay away from areas with lots of large bushes/trees that attackers can hide behind. Not just parks, but front gardens too.
Wear shoes you can run in.
Do be careful what you wear, but not in terms of provocativeness: some street attackers often choose their victim in terms of how easily they can run away and how easy it is to access their vagina. So, to spell it out for some people, a woman wearing an ankle-length skirt may be more likely to be attacked by an opportunistic street rapist than a woman with shorts that take more time/are more difficult to get off and are easier to run in. Rapists who attack a stranger in the street often need quick, easy access - they do not always have the victim contained in a room/vehicle and don't want them to have the chance to get away. They also don't want to be somewhere too long and get caught. Pinning a woman down and undoing zips and buttons is more difficult and time-consuming than pinning her down and lifting her skirt.
Carry something large-ish in your hands that you could easily hit an attacker with, such as an umbrella or tightly rolled-up newspaper. People don't want to attack someone who could easily fight back.
Walk along confidently, strongly, and look alert - attackers want to catch someone off-guard (don't walk & text, don't have your headphones in, etc) who looks timid and easily-overpowered.
Carry a rape alarm with you and make sure you have easy access to it (not right at the bottom of your bag/pocket).
If you don't have one, shout and scream at them to get away from you if they approach you - they don't want the attention.
If someone grabs you from behind, step on their foot or try and elbow them.
If someone comes up to you from the front, thrust the bottom of your palm up under their chin to push their head back and hopefully make them lose their balance/grip.
If they are able to overpower you and sexually assault you, shout "FIRE!", because people are more likely to run and help than if you shout "RAPE!" because people don't want to witness something so disturbing (poor them...).
Wanna know something else? They never made it seem like these things were a guarantee that you wouldn't get attacked, neither did they sound like they would judge anyone or blame them for not following these guidelines if they get attacked. Shitty people are shitty people and we should blame them instead of the person that decided to take a shortcut home because they needed to get back before 11, or wore a skirt because they thought it looked pretty. Neither of those things are "invites" to be attacked.
Another thing is, the "don't walk alone" argument is a brilliant way for rapists to offer to walk a woman home like a gentleman, with the sole intention of attacking them. Lovely. And you could get a taxi to avoid walking home alone, but then you have to be extra careful that it's a real cab driver from a reputable company that does background checks, as you could end up locked in a car with a rapist. Great. Are women just not supposed to go near any male strangers just in case they get raped? Dating for straight women might get a bit difficult if so...
Actually, the truth is most rapes are not attacks from strangers in the street. To quote Rape Crisis' website: "only 9% of rapes are committed by 'strangers'. Women are raped in their homes and in their work places where they are less likely to be believed and even less likely to report. This myth can control movements and restricts freedom. This can feel like women are living under a 'curfew' and that it is a woman's responsibility to be either in or out at certain times. Around 90% of rapes are committed by known men."
So, does this mean the only option is for women to avoid contact with men entirely, just in case? After all, available data shows that 95% of victims say their offender(s) was male and nearly one in four women worldwide may experience sexual violence by an intimate partner in their lifetime. That'd be a bit extreme and kinda sad - I like my male friends and family, and I love my boyfriend, so much so that I trust him with my life. I understand little things like segregated train carts to avoid being groped by a stranger, but avoiding all male contact is just stupid, has huge negatives (yaaay segregation...) and would be stupidly hard to implement. Also, it only helps (possible) female assault victims, not male ones...
Ok. So, what if we all just covered up and made ourselves look undesirable, then maybe we won't be the targets of rapists? I mean, they usually go for *ahem* certain women.
Well, to repeat myself, the whole idea of rape victims just being attractive women or women who dress provocatively is complete bollocks... To quote Rape Crisis' site again: "Many women are led to believe that if they are not part of a certain category of women then they are 'safe' from being raped. Women and girls of all ages, classes, culture, ability, sexuality, race and faith are raped. Attractiveness has little significance. Reports show that there is a great diversity in the way targeted women act or dress. Rapists choose women based on their vulnerability not their physical appearance."
Vulnerability. See that word? See how the tips I was given by police/council were about trying to make yourself less vulnerable? Be able to run away? Be able to fight back? Be able to get help? Not once did any of the people advising us on our safety tell us to "not dress provocatively" or "make yourself look ugly" to "keep the rapists away". Why? Because it is complete bollocks.
The biggest danger noted with that whole argument of "it's what they were wearing" is that women who do not dress provocatively may assume that they're 'safe' because they dress modestly. But they're not safe. As many women will unfortunately know, modesty does not automatically give you a ticket to a rape-free life, even to a catcall-free life; I got leered at by two men when I was covered head-to-toe just because I was eating a long wrap. Some creeps will sexualise you in any way possible and covering up your body does not mean rapists will not think of what is underneath your clothing and attempt to get at it.
Most rapes are done by people the victim knows because the rapist realises that the victim is vulnerable to them and know they can't fight back. They can't fight back because they're not physically strong enough or are caught in a position they can't move out of. They can't fight back because that person has the power to spread rumours about them or do other things to make their life a misery if they do. They can't fight back because they would never expect that person to ever attack them and are caught off-guard.They can't fight back because they aren't sober (or maybe not even conscious) because they trusted that person enough to get drunk next to them (or to buy them a drink without spiking it). They can't fight back because they're scared of what injuries they'll receive if they do. They can't fight back because someone else they love is in danger if they do.They can't fight back because they're scared that they'll be killed if they do. They are chosen as victims because the rapist has power over them that they can exert, physical or otherwise.
"Rape culture" is spoken about a lot, because it perpetuates stupid false ideas like "inviting rape" with clothes and creates another vulnerability for women who are raped: they cant fight back after it happens, because certain people won't believe them.
People won't think it was rape because they sleep around a lot anyway.
People will think they were "asking for it" because of their "sexy", revealing clothes or their drunkenness.
People won't believe it even happened because they're "not attractive enough".
People won't think the guy did it because "he's a nice guy, he's not a crazy person".
People won't think it was rape, because if she really didn't want it, she wouldn't have invited him back to her place for a chat.
People won't think it was rape, because if she really didn't want it, she wouldn't have been nice to him and flirted with him.
People won't think it was rape, because if she really didn't want it, she would've just pushed him off (this one especially affects men also).
A few things to finish this post:
Rape is asserting and abusing power for instant sexual gratification and/or the feeling of superiority over another person.
It is not a crime only done by "sickos" or mentally ill people (quoting Rape Crisis again: "Studies have indicated that as few as 5% of men are psychotic at the time of their crimes. Few convicted rapists are referred for psychiatric treatment").
It is not women "asking for it" - most guys don't have to automatically stop themselves from raping a woman just because she has her legs and cleavage on show. It is a crime done by disgusting people that don't understand that no means no.
Women who are raped are 'chosen' by their attackers because they have a vulnerability that the attacker can exploit, not because they "look sexy" or are "asking for it".
Anyway, I'm just fed up of seeing idiots like this (usually male, I hate to say), who know nothing about rape or what victims go through, spouting crap about this like they're the bloody fountain of knowledge when it comes to sexual assault. You're not - neither am I, but as a woman who has received actual useful advice from professionals who know the facts, and as someone who knows people who have gone through this stuff, I just wanted to share my thoughts on your ignorance.
It's especially annoying when there is countless evidence, even stuff published back in 1978, that de-bunks all these stupid arguments time and time again.
I'm off to go and think about something more cheerful now. Thanks for reading, especially if you got all the way down to this bit. I didn't do this as a video, just because I knew it would be very long and I have other videos I want to do - another big reason is that I also find that certain stuff is more striking when written down in black-and-white.
Edit: just want to stick this Louis C.K. clip in here as it adds to some of my points and is bloody funny and should lighten the mood of this post...! (won't let me embed for some reason, so here's a link: "There is no greater threat to women than men")
For those of you that haven't yet heard, Everyday Sexism is a brilliant new movement started up by Laura Bates, which has taken the internet by storm and even made Facebook change their rules. Fed up of seeing all the sexual verbal and physical abuse that women put up with - and having endured it herself - she set up an online space where women could share their experiences with the world, and also a Twitter account. Also, whilst it started as (and is still mostly) a place for women to share their stories, it also shouts out against sexism towards men. It's the kind of feminist movement I'm happy to stand beside.
EverydaySexism video (I highly recommend you watch this if you haven't already) YouTube link here.
Now, I made a video a few weeks ago about the subject of street harassment. I was responding to some of the extremely sexist and ignorant comments on another video about verbal and minor-physical street harassment I'd watched. There were hundreds of comments along the lines of "take a damn compliment", "this is not harassment", "guys deal with this too, you're not allowed to complain", "they're just talking, they're not going to physically hurt you", etc, etc. This annoyed me and I made a rebuttal, which you can watch below if you wish.
In this video I mentioned a couple of things that have happened to me: being groped aged 13 by a boy in the street and being told "well you shouldn't have worn that skirt", and being leered at by couple of men earlier this year for eating a wrap (oh the sexiness of it... -_- ). These are only two examples of harassment I've faced in my lifetime thanks to being female, and I thought I'd share some other cases of harassment, and general sexist comments/acts, in random order in solidarity with the EverydaySexism campaign.
Having several grown men leer/wink/shout at me in one day because I wore a top that showed off a little of my midriff (& to clarify, it was a top intended for children & so I thought it was fine to wear). I saw where their eyes were darting to & never wore that top again. I was 12.
Constant shock from boys when they find out I can actually play football and can kick the ball directly to them (I was on my school teams in primary and secondary school, one mixed). Also playing games with boys & often having them either never pass the ball to me because they think I'll immediately lose it, or pass it to me ridiculously gently as if I can't stop the ball with my feet (it usually stops before it reaches me & I have to run for it).
Playing football with a mixed group and aggressively being ordered to "pass the ball, wench!". I didn't pass him the ball...
A boy in a Computer Science tutorial, suggesting that me and the other girl in our group only got high marks because our tutor was a woman and therefore she was giving us special treatment. Fortunately, everyone quickly put him in his place, saying everyone else got similar marks and pointing out that his marks probably weren't the best because he would only start his weekly projects the hour before they were due for submission.
Had two boys (older & bigger than me) follow me shouting, "Oi, mate! oi! Bruv!" at me aged about 16 because I had a short pixie-style haircut. I was in my all-girls school uniform with mandatory skirt. Definitely not a 'mistake' on their part... Girls just can't have short hair apparently.
Being told I only mention I'm a gamer because I want attention from men, not because it's been a genuine interest of mine since childhood that I enjoy talking about with other people.
Having people assume I was a lesbian because I went to an all-girls secondary school, and have them shout this at me down the street. This happened to most girls at our school and friends from other all-girls schools have shared similar stories with me. Especially annoying that "lesbian" was always said as an insult.
Google thinking I'm a man because of the websites I've visited (gaming, news & comedy are what I look up most, alongside cat & dog videos...). Kind of amusing but a bit sad at the same time...
A male employee in Game in 2010 going "Oh! So you're a REAL gamer?!" in genuine shock, when I answered his question of "so what games have you played recently?" when paying at the till.
Being beeped at whilst walking along with my other female friend because we were wearing shorts in the summer. Not even short-shorts. We were about 15.
A random guy (i.e. not an employee) coming up to me in the Game shop in Hamley's basement this year, and telling me how the two games I had in my hand were "amazing" and I should buy them. I don't mind advice from fellow gamers, but this guy was speaking to me as if I had no idea what the games were (one of the games was the original Bioshock. BIOSHOCK.). It also greatly annoyed my boyfriend who was nearby at the time & doesn't appreciate people talking to me like I'm a simpleton. I also caught the guy when he first saw me in the game section and he looked like he'd just seen a unicorn, so part of it may have been a crappy reason to just come up & talk to me. Whatever it was, it was bizarre, patronising and made me stay very close to my 6ft1 boyfriend afterwards (safety in vertical numbers...).
Being told aged 20 by my then-boyfriend that he didn't want me to do stand up comedy because "You would just embarrass yourself." "Why?" "Because women just aren't funny".
Other classics from the same guy: "All women comedians do is make period jokes." "Men are just naturally funnier" - yeah? tell that to the many crappy male comedians whose sets I've sat through and the others that just constantly make dick jokes. I'm still waiting for their "natural talent" to blossom...
When I make people laugh, I sometimes get the line "you're funny for a girl".
Wearing a low-ish cut v-necked t-shirt on a hot summer's day and having a group of older men make creepy faces/noises and boob-grabbing gestures at me. I was about 16 and walking along with my mum.
Scandinavian girl in a degree course I was in, in a discussion about women in the workplace, angrily wondered why most of the British students' mothers had stayed at home to raise their kids instead of being "real" women and carrying on working, with their children in the company creche. Lecturer had to kindly explain to her that the childcare options for parents in Britain are not as good (or as cost free) as those at her rich mother's company, or in her country in general, so she shouldn't be accusing us of having less-capable work-shy mothers as many are forced to stay at home. He also said that she shouldn't look down on women who decide to be stay-at-home mothers, because feminism is also about women having the choice to be at work or stay home with their kid(s). He was an awesome lecturer.
Being on a school trip with our year, and having a man open his coat up & masturbate in front of us as we were walking along. There were 90 of us, all aged 12/13.
Creepy-arse comments from people on my YouTube videos, saying what sexual things they would like to do to me. Never gonna happen.
Shared a good article about the creepy-as-hell "It's ok, just let it happen, it'll be over soon" line said at the Xbox One E3 event. Got this response:
I'm guessing "pun intended" means he was referencing anal rape (and doing so as a 'joke') because the article talks about rape. I don't understand how "calm thine tits" is a pun, that's just saying, "calm down woman" in an even ruder way. I don't understand how either one is a pun actually - puns are funny play-on-words jokes with double meanings, not rape references and sexist phrases. I also don't understand what putting #videogames is supposed to mean - that rape jokes are just a part of video game culture? Because I've played various forms of video games since I was about 4, played online MMOs (mainly Runescape) as a teen, and I honestly have only seen rape jokes and references being used widely in gaming in last 5 years or so, mostly by the more immature members of the community. Like this idiot.
Was waiting on a street corner, outside the shop I'd just come out of, trying to cross the road. Car pulls up in front of me and the guy winks and me, 'kisses' at me and pats the passenger seat. I give him a disgusted look & step back, making him drive off (scared I'd tell the people in the shop, I bet). I was about 10.
Was out with members of my university dance society on a society night out. The majority of our group were women & when we accidentally walked into a room in a club that was closed for a private party for the uni mens' rugby teams, they started singing a song about tits, vaginas, sex, etc, laughing heartily. Such gentlemen.
Constantly being told "I wish there were more girls like you". You know what? There are LOTS of girls like me, stop assuming all girls are rubbish with a few exceptions. Same to girls that do the same thing with guys. Not everyone in one gender is exactly the same with a few exceptions.
On the bus to work, drunk guy gets on the bus (he stank of alcohol) and decides to sit directly behind me, despite it being pretty empty. No big deal to me, until I hear him making kissy noises right behind me into my ear. Urgh.
At about 6 years old, had a boy in the year above constantly come up to me & lift up my skirt in the playground because he thought this was hilarious.
Usually being the first person the shop assistant comes up to in any video game store to see if I 'need any help' (this has gradually reduced though, which is really good).
Being sent an explicit email from someone, because they liked me but didn't know how to tell me, so they got their 30+ year old friend to write a disgusting email to me (saying explicit things about parts of my body, including words like "scabby c*nt") out of frustration. I was 16. They never got a date with me. I did forgive him but we became very distant friends after that.
Every time I go into a club I end up with at least 1 of the following happening to me: guy trying to grind his crotch into my bum, guy pretend-humping me from behind, being groped, stroked, grabbed, leered at, etc. I just want to dance around to S Club 7 with my friends and have fun without feeling like we have to constantly defend ourselves, and each other, from perverts. Fuck. Off.
Was approached by two guys in a club who said their friend liked me and pointed over to him. Without looking at him (to not give off the impression that I was checking him out before making a 'decision'), I said straight away to his friends "I'm sorry to disappoint him, but I have a boyfriend" (I did). I then looked across at the guy to smile and be empathetic (I've liked people only to find out they were taken & it's not fun). At that moment I saw him say to a friend, "pfft, yeah, whatever...she's just saying that". No. I honestly have a boyfriend. Not every woman in a club is available - also not every available girl is out looking for a guy. Many are just there for the music.
Working as a bar-person at Ascot Races, aged 19, three men (looking in their 40s/50s) said they would refuse to pay me unless I gave them each a kiss on the cheek. I blew them a half-hearted kiss instead because I just wanted them to go away & that was ok for them, but they were obviously disappointed. Still kicking myself that I didn't go get my manager or at least threaten them with it - I was too scared of being accused of not enjoying "light-hearted banter".
Adverts like THIS online, often being shown next to my videos on YouTube. Degrading to women (boobs & 'no women'...) and insulting to many male gamers who don't just choose games with their penis.
Being told by people, when I complain about really bad cases of sexism, that I should 'not make a big deal' out of 'non-issues' or that there are 'more important things to worry about in the world', or 'other people go through much worse than that' or 'stop being such a feminazi'.
I cannot eat a long cylindrical ice lolly without getting a 'look' from at least one male. It's annoying because Calippos are bloody delicious.
Guy I shared my first kiss with at 14 in an under-18s disco. We had only just met and I'd let him kiss me so soon after meeting because I thought that he was really nice as he'd said the nicest things any guy had said to me & had already asked for my number, sorted out a date & been a complete gentleman (I was a little naive). Later on in the evening I found out that he thought a kiss meant he could touch me wherever he wanted to, as he tried to put his hand down my top and up my skirt on the inside of my thigh (several times, despite me moving his hands away every single time). Stupidly, I still met up with him for a date afterwards because I thought that maybe it was a one-off and he wasn't like that all the time. He was. I also found out I wasn't the only girl he'd kissed or got the number of, but apparently he called me first because I was the best as I was 'the fittest'. He didn't get a second date.
Walking past a barbers, hearing"DAYUM!", and thinking it was funny until a guy walked out and followed me, making cat-calling kissy noises to try & get my attention as I walked away. I flipped him the bird over my shoulder & he wasn't best pleased... Too bad mate, I'm not a bloody cat.
Being on a coach going to and from PE lessons (the playing fields we sometimes used were a short drive away) and passing a car wash / garage where at least one guy would mime wanking/kissing/having sex towards us. This happened every week we drove past, from year 9 (about 13/14 yrs old).
That was just a selection of things off the top of my head. Now, whilst I have written this list, I am not looking for pity or sympathy. What I ask for is empathy, not just for me but for women all over the world that deal with this stuff every single day. Many deal with much worse; I'm pretty lucky tbh, even compared with some of my own friends in the UK. Maybe you shouldn't dismiss every woman as a "feminazi" if they stand up against something they constantly have to deal with. Just be understanding.
And to the minority of my viewers that have voiced concerns that I am 'obsessed' with women's issues and are worried that my YouTube Channel will turn into a 'feminist' channel - I have said this before, but I am female. I will sometimes bring these issues up in videos because (as you can see from the list above) I have to deal with them, A LOT. Covering those topics doesn't mean I won't go back and talk about other things, three videos on a subject does not mean I'm "obsessed". I'm a woman, and that means that sometimes I might talk about this stuff in videos, because it directly affects me, many people I love and a huge chunk of the world's population (as well as men!). It's ridiculous and sometimes I need to confront it, in a ranty &/or humourous way. And I also just want to say that I have also had lots of positive experiences with male strangers in public throughout my life - being courteous, smiling politely, paying me compliments in totally non-creepy ways (it IS possible, people), helping me get my suitcase down from the shelf on the train because they can see I'm a shortarse, being protected in moshpits at gigs (and a guy practically saving my friend from being trampled when she fell in one), etc. So yeah, I've got no problem with men, just the creepy sexist ones.
Anyway, if you still think I'm a scary 'feminazi' because of this blog post, check out EverydaySexism. Please take some time to read through some of the thousands of stories posted on their website, or follow them on Twitter, and please learn to empathise with people. Thanks x
"Those who choose not to empathise, enable real monsters - for, without ever committing an act of outright evil ourselves, we collude with it through our own apathy." - J.K. Rowling
There was an incident with a large spider in my room last night. This is the post I wrote afterwards to my friends on Facebook so that I didn't feel so alone...: "There is a spider in my room. After a massive battle (me seeing it crawl under my desk, then me squeaking & poking my bin underneath with a coat hanger until it ran back out) I caught it under a mug & slipped some paper underneath, but now I'm too scared to move it (it's effing massive). I don't want to wake anyone up to get rid of it, so I've labelled it in case someone comes in in the morning & picks up the random mug in the middle of the floor & unknowingly releases the demonic creature within."
Follow-up comment:
"After a horrible dream about it escaping (not fun), my mum came in & got it this morning & my room is now spider-free! She also agreed that it was massive & said I was very brave for even going near it. She obviously didn't hear all the panicked breathing and the 'ohhhhh nonononononononononononoooo... Please no... Don't hide under there you little ****!'"
Sooo....yeah.... That was me going mental on Facebook to calm myself down...
I honestly have no idea where I got the strength to go near the thing. It must've been pure adrenaline - I knew I couldn't sleep with it wandering around free in my room so I just woke up; I knew I just had to trap it until the morning or I'd get no sleep (read: I had to trap it because I was scared that I'd wake up with a spider on my face in the middle of the night). I didn't want to wake up anyone else to do it, so it had to be me. I poked the bin it was hiding by, it ran back out and directly towards me *shudders*, at which point I shoved my NMBCM mug over it (Jack Skellington saves the day!). I think a big part of it was that my carpet is so dark and the lights had been off so, when I turned them on to find the spider, it wasn't too bright; this all meant that I mostly just saw a rough shape, rather than something I'm terrified of. If my carpet had been beige or my room a little bit brighter, I might've found it impossible to go near it.
Also, the spider is fine & was released in to the garden this morning - I don't like killing them, I just need them far away from me...
So, I saw a video by TotalBiscuit/TotalHalibut about his opinions on used games. Wanna know something? A lot of what he said made sense. I found myself going, "Yes, that's very true" and not getting as angry as a lot of his followers on Twitter (his responses to them were why I went and watched the video).
Now, I recommend you watch the video. It IS long (30 minutes-ish), but he says a lot in it and makes some very good points about how gaming's income stream is different to other forms of media. This is true and people need to realise this. He also used to work in Game, therefore knows that they have an agressive sell-used policy. I can vouch for this myself - I've often gone up to the till with a new copy of the game, only to be asked, "would you like a used copy instead?" Most of the time the used copy is only £2-£5 cheaper, and I'd rather pay that extra, knowing that my money was getting to the developers. However, I have bought used if the game is drastically cheaper & I can't afford to buy new, or if I am unable to find a new copy. However, there ends the bits I agree with. The problem is he keeps comparing the console games model to the PC games model, saying "us PC players are going all digital" and "we have eliminated used games and we still get awesome deals on Steam". Yes, both of those are true, but the PC games sales model is COMPLETELY DIFFERENT to the console games one. Yes, Steam has amazing sales (and are amazing because they also have Mac-compatible games at the same price!!), but Steam is NOT the ONLY digital platform where you can buy games. Steam is in constant competition with developers who sell direct from their websites (Minecraft, anyone?), free-to-play online games (I put a lot of hours into Runescape as a teen...), even casual gaming sites can offer some competition. PC games are also in indirect competition with everything else you can do on a PC - developers have to make sure games are cheap enough AND fun enough to stop people from closing that game & opening up YouTube. There are also far lower barriers to entry in the PC games market; you don't have to get special licensing from a huge corporation for your game to be sold to play on a PC, you don't have to meet certain criteria, you just have to make it available. Because of this, there is HUGE choice for PC gamers out there; they merely have to search in Google to find a decent game they can play, often for free. Where can I buy digital content for my Xbox 360? Xbox live. Anywhere else? No. It's the same with the Playstation 3 and PSN. Yes, they sometimes have sales, but NEVER on new-release games like the offers you can find on Steam and hardly ever at the lower prices. Why? because each of those selling platforms are the ONLY PLACE to get digital content for those consoles (apart from some DLC packages sold in stores). Microsoft and Sony have a monopoly when it comes to digital gaming on their platforms. Why ANYONE would see this as a good thing for consumers, I don't know. If you do, please go pick up a basic business studies book & have a read. Right now there IS competition in the form of retail & used games - it's not perfect, but it's something. Then again, it is sometimes ignored - the other day I saw Black Ops 2 was £59.99 on PSN. How much was it in the few stores I could find it in, new? £44.99. TB did say retailers apparently pressured publishers to not have cheaper digital copies of games, but I very much doubt they have the power to say games had to be over £15 more... That's just greed, either from Sony or the publisher (or both). The real problem is that brand new games are expensive on console. TB said that, relative to inflation, they're cheaper than before; the thing is inflation hasn't affected games that much because they are not an essential item. Food, energy and housing has gone up in price mainly because we NEED those things and we can't just stop buying them; gaming is a luxury, therefore people can easily cut it out if the prices go too high for them. This means that whilst a loaf of bread has doubled in price in my lifetime, entertainment items like games have only gone up a little (don't want to scare off all the customers, do they?). Even so, I don't often buy at launch. Most of my game collection is bought new, but months after at a much lower price - this is because I joined the current-gen console gang a few years after everyone else & now find myself constantly going back and catching-up with old games, but also because I could not (and currently cannot) afford to buy all my games at release-date value. We have a system where more cautious people who wait a few months and read everyone's reviews are the ones who are rewarded, getting a lower price & knowing more about what they are paying for (and publishers complain that not enough people buy on release-date...). Publishers have all these pre-order deals, throwing in "bonuses", which are often just codes for disk-locked content, purely aesthetic in-game features or a pretty box. You know what would increase pre-orders? £10 off the release price for pre-ordered games. If that's too much, make it £5 (see, I'm being nice). Gamers take a chance on a before it launches, they get a good deal on it. There is also this thing, not seen in PC gaming nowadays, that ALL console games are around £40 at release. There is this 'default' price, but some games have hundreds of hours worth of high-quality content, whilst others may have 5-10. Some games are of amazing quality, and others are crap, yet they all have a similar price tag on release day (£35-45 in the UK). This doesn't happen on the PC games market - developers can work out the optimal price point for their game and have optimum sales. They don't have to go "ok...so sony/microsoft wants us to make a game worth £40. We have to develop a game in that price range". They can make the game they want. Microsoft and Sony have become better at pricing with Arcade, smaller PSN games and older titles (digital & physical), but for the big releases, they don't seem to realise that not all games are worth the same amount on release. This is one reason why I don't trust them to have the monopoly on their systems & why many people hesitate to buy at launch.
Anyway, wrapping this up (I did babble on for a bit there...), you can't just point to the PC digital games market and go, "Look, that works, stop complaining about used games being taken away". It's a different environment and until the console digital games market turns into an equally diverse space, you can't just go "all retailers are bad, booooo used games, bring on digital". I also don't think used games are as huge an issue as publishers make them out to be. Yes there are massive "pre-owned" displays in shops, but look through them and you'll find only a handful of good games. You wanna find out what boring games to avoid? You wanna find out what games have been made obsolete because publishers bring out a slightly-updated one every year? Look in pre-owned. Sooo many sports games... Used games are a great way to see how good a game is - only one copy of Uncharted 3 in there? Guess it was pretty good. Let's go see if we can buy it new. Loads of Tiger Woods games? Guess it gets pretty repetitive...best avoid that one. LOADS of copies of Aliens: Colonial Marines? Guess all the crap reviews it got were spot on... Trade-ins of crappy games feed new sales (I know because both my boyfriend & I have traded in to get brand new items) & let the consumer know what other gamers thought. Maybe that's another reason why publishers don't like used games..? Hmm? We need a middle ground, rather than going for just one or the other. Right now, used games help give console gamers a little bit of leverage in the market. I don't mind paying a little to unlock a used game & make sure money goes STRAIGHT to the developer, but I don't like the idea of paying £10 that the developers never see & instead goes straight into EA's pocket. It is a broken system, but a monopoly would be far, far worse.
Here's another video that also shares my point of view & is very eloquent and well-argued. Go watch it if you have time!
I have a LOT to say about the Xbox One, but for now I'm just going to focus on the name.
I understand what they are trying to achieve with the name, to show that it is "all your entertainment needs in one box", and gamers' first choice for next-gen gaming, but it's just not the first Xbox. So, here are some alternatives I came up with:
Xbox Focus
Xbox Central
Xbox Singularity
Xbox Single
Xbox all the Single Ladies...?
Xbox...
Xbox...
Ok... I guess Xbox One is a lot more consumer friendly than the ones I came up with... The ex-maths student in me just has an issue with the video game industry naming series of things with the wrong numbers (I love you, Rockstar, but I'm lookin' at you!)...
I was playing with my shiny new PS3 the other day (yes, thanks to my boyfriend, I'm now one of those people with both an Xbox 360 and a PS3 - feel free to judge me) and I spotted this promotional ad for Playstation Plus:
Now, I wasn't sure what to think when I first saw this. I actually did a double take. Did Sony actually think their user base was so thick that they didn't know how many days there were in a year? Because, at first glance, it kinda looks like that.
At my second glance I didn't think this could be the case, so I concluded that Sony must have a grudge against leap years. No sneakily buying PS Plus on the 28th February in a leap year so you get an extra free day! No no no.
I can understand why that's the case, it's only fair really, but this ad just made me laugh when I saw it. I imagined some meeting with a load of executives wondering if people will try and scam an extra day of gaming out of them. To be honest, it's a little pedantic when PS Plus works out at only around a penny a day anyway...
It's the bottom line that just makes it for me. They could've put "one year's membership is 365 days"; instead it looks like they're trying to teach gamers stuff we learnt when we were kids.
To be honest, "Buy 365 days, get 90 extra free" sounds fine too...
^ This is what happens when you study marketing and advertising. Every little thing not put across as well as it could be bugs the hell out of you.
I tried to make a video today. I tried. I was all set to go this morning after a failed attempt yesterday; I had filmed a video, but I hated it so much that I deleted it straight off the camera rather than bother to upload it into iMovie. However, I deleted it knowing that today I would have a better shot at it as I would be in a much better mindset. I was right; I woke up with my creative muscles tingling, ready to make the best video EVER. Then came the drilling. Oh the drilling... The incessant drilling... Even when it did stop & my hopes would rise, it would begin again only a few minutes later. I couldn't even write anything with that noise boring into my head like the drill into the brickwork. It was so loud that I thought it was from next door; it wasn't. The work was being done three doors down. I don't even... Anyway, to escape the noise (and be remotely useful) I went out and helped my mum do the shopping. We even went for cream tea! #ballin' I came back, feeling happy, to a quiet house. Finally! I pulled up my notes, got my camera set up and was ready to go when...dogs. Barking dogs. Right outside. It just wasn't happening. I gave up. So this is just me saying that I was planning on putting up a video today & be all productive, but the world just wouldn't let me. Honestly. I tried.
Ok. So I wanted to write something about this woman before, but I thought I'd let things play out and remark upon the whole thing, mainly comments from people I have seen and heard. So now, a week after her funeral, I know what I'd like to say. You see, there are some things that have been said over & over again by so many people, and I would just like to address a few of them. 1. "People who weren't born or were still being potty trained when she left power can't say anything about her" So does that mean anyone born after 1945 isn't allowed to think Hitler was an arsehole or say the holocaust was horrifying? Does that mean that anyone born after 1968 isn't allowed to say that Martin Luther King Jr. played a huge part in the civil rights movement? I could go on... To be honest, if that argument was any good, it would mean history wouldn't be taught in schools - I mean, what's the point? We can't say anything about it, because we weren't born yet... I'm sorry, but just because we weren't old enough to remember when she was in power, doesn't mean we can't learn about what she did from books, parents, teachers, etc. Also, we grew up affected by her policies, as shown by this brilliant blog post here (go read it, or else). 2. "Someone has died, show some respect" Don't use her death as an opportunity to shut people up - most people who are complaining now have complained about her for YEARS. Also I feel that people have a right to voice their anger that £10m was spent on her funeral at a time when everyone is facing cuts. When Hitler died, did everyone who hated him suddenly have to be nice about him? No. Respect is earned by what someone did in their life, not automatically dished out at death. 3. "You should respect her for what she achieved, becoming the first female Prime Minister" Oh I can respect her for that. Doesn't mean I have to like her though. That being said, I don't respect David Cameron one bit, so why should I respect the person he gets most of his ideas from? 4. "She put Britain back on the map" Really? I wasn't aware we fell off it... Oh you mean politically? Oh ok. Well I guess the way she did it was the only way and I'm sure the millions who ended up unemployed or dead from her actions really appreciate that. 5. "Now is not the time to complain" This is similar to point 2, but is all about timing. We shouldn't be complaining about her past because she's only just died. Yes, it's sad that a family has lost a loved one, and we should let them grieve. But the world must remember that people grieved years ago as people died thanks to her policies - those people are allowed to be angry. Whilst I wasn't out burning effigies on the day of her funeral, I could understand why others were; they didn't want the world to have a rose-tinted view of someone who was far from perfect and caused a great deal of suffering. And again, people have every right to be angry that so much was spent on such a hated woman when so many important things are facing cuts (like the A&E I rely on). I personally ignored the funeral. Why? Because, honestly I don't care about her death. Why? Because she didn't seem to care about people (at least not the poor ones). Also, whilst some are dancing on her grave, we must remember that Thatcherism is still very, very much alive today.
